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No long period of time to talk, should sneak. Check out all of our impressions and reviews based on information from the Joystiq Network right now week:

This may appear fancy a raunchy story — the sort of catfight tale ending in on broken nails and torn clothing. We got type of anticipating this scuffles to take place as seven beautiful ladies tussled such beyond Thursday night in at a Manhattan bar & restaurant referred to as Sutton Place. Alas, we did not get to see anything and everything underlyingly lewd, but there got definitely a sufficient amount of sweaty bods to force the male crowd to a frenzy.

Taking portion in a Nintendo publicity stunt referred to as “Wii Box in the City,” such women tested out this gaming intelligence and battling skills in a Wii Sports boxing tourney to win a Wii system. The night was demented all night as crowds of supporters cheered and jeered. It came downward to Mari (in blue) and Regina (in yellow) for the championship. We caught up investing in Mari before the big fight; she informed us nearly her Wii experience: “I’ve played Wii before. It’s want a workout.” Regina on the a greater number of hand had never played the Wii before, additonally both ladies never had any gaming undergo past that.

Soon, it was opportunity for the ultimate fight. The two fought bravely, but in the end Regina won surrounded by a knock out. “Oh my god, you won!” exclaimed May, Regina’s smartest friend, whose excitement was fancy such a of a kid on Christmas morning. Regina gave her lucrative prize during to May who carried on to laud her bestest friend: “She in fact killed it! She’s the bestest friend ever!” Who appreciate so gaming and bar fights might bid friends closer together?

Someone’s knocking on Nintendo’s door, and he just drove through seven red lights in a hijacked car with a shotgun in tow to get there. Forbes has published a piece on how Grand Theft Auto IV’s success threatens the Nintendo Wii since the console, you know, doesn’t have the game. In fact, that’s all the article seems to be saying: the Wii is doing great, but because it doesn’t have GTA IV, that money-printing success might be at a halt.

While that’s how the article is framed, the direction seems to split off from there, with the author talking about GTA IV’s success juxtaposed with complaints about the Wii’s hardware, online and abundance of shovelware — he even bring up Chris Heck’s duct tape rant. Said the article, “The problem is, it could get tougher and tougher to go the other way. It’s hard to imagine how the sprawling world of Grand Theft Auto IV–which already taxes the multicore processors powering the XBox and Playstation–could be recreated on the Wii.”

We’re not saying Nintendo doesn’t have problems with shovelware or appealing to the more hardcore gamer crowd, but we also think the way the article presents its case makes the GTA IV issue feel a little taped on. If the UK Wii Fit launch is any indication, Nintendo’s money train is still right on track.

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“I’m perfectly satisfied,” you say to yourself as your fingers dart across spongy, fake frets. “I don’t need those fancy high-definition graphics. As long as I can make out the notes, I’m happy. Heck, I can even see them when I close my eyes.” Indeed, you’re more than delighted with the PS2 version of Rock Band, the musical friend that keeps you company as you rock out in the basement. Alone.

EA, Harmonix and MTV Games can’t help you with your graphics or self-deception issues, but they can offer you some of the downloadable tracks that Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3 owners of Rock Band have been enjoying. Mind you, they won’t be “downloadable” so much as they’ll be purchasable for $29.99. The Rock Band Track Pack Volume 1, headed for Wii (the full game is out on June 22) and PlayStation 2 on July 15th, will contain 20 songs from such artists as David Bowie, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Weezer and Oasis.

Peer past the break for the full list and see if you go, “Ah, there’s that song I like! I will gladly purchase this standalone set of tracks! I’m still talking to myself!”
30 Seconds to Mars — “The Kill”
All American Rejects — “Move Along”
Blink – 182 — “All the Small Things”
Boston — “More Than a Feeling”
David Bowie — “Moonage Daydream”
Faith No More — “We Care A Lot”
Grateful Dead — “Truckin’”
The Hives — “Die, All Right!”
KISS — “Calling Dr. Love”
Lynyrd Skynyrd — “Gimme’ Three Steps”
Nine Inch Nails — “March of the Pigs”
Oasis — “Live Forever”
Paramore — “Crushcrushcrush”
The Police — “Synchronicity II”
Queens of the Stone Age — “Little Sister”
Ramones — “Teenage Lobotomy”
Smashing Pumpkins — “Siva”
Stone Temple Pilots — “Interstate Love Song”
Weezer — “Buddy Holly”
Wolfmother — “Joker & the Thief”
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In much the same way that one might admire the Lillberg sofa-bed in an IKEA before throwing a mid-riot brick through the window, Ubisoft says it was impressed with the Wii’s capabilities while bringing Prince of Persia: Rival Swords (by its own admission a “quick and dirty port”) to the console. Nintendic reports that the company told Edge magazine that it would like to return the Persian prince to Nintendo’s box, only (and presumably) it would put some actual effort into it this time.

Ubisoft is also emphatic that this game, if ever given the green light, wouldn’t be a port of the recently announced next-gen entry. In fact, it said, that will “never happen.” So … can we put that down for a “maybe?”

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